I should tell you I have no tollerance for stupid people so if you fall into that category, I don't know what to tell you..."It's not me, it's you" I'm really not as jaded as I sound. I can't stand drama as my life has recently been put through the cleaners... I have my moments but, I'm at overload right now. I want love, kick you in the face, can't stay away from eachother...True Romance..Nightmare before Christmas..We''re different and we love it...LOVE...Love is my greatest enemy right now...I love you, I'd give it all up..money, fame, lust, and life...for love. I'd let today be my last if I could spend it with you..The me that I know adds a little real to the typical bullshit. My vow is to live my life for me and to succeed at doing it, as cliche as it is..to live every day like it was my last. My life has changed so drastically lately and then it flipped a bitch on the freeway and changed again. People I though would be in my life for a very long time are gone and the morning it happened I never would have guessed it was the last time fate would let me wake up next to one of my best friends. I'm here why are'nt you? I don't care what anyone says..Crazy people are hot..for about a week, you gave me very minimal temporary insanity compared to years of mind altering numb the pain toxants, I must say, if we were on Law and Order I'd win my case...Muderers walk but I got the chair...I can take a bow and exit stage left when required but this time I really want to wait for the roses...or tomatoes depends on who is throwing them I guess..Personally I wish I could make monkey fly out of my ass but that's just me...Or ex-ray vision, that'd be tight too..I like to bring out the insanity in people and from what I've seen recently i AM REALLY FUCKING GOOD AT IT unintentionally that is..I just want to find a Benny for my Joon...Until then...Jack Daniels will be just fine.. Do what you want to have fun in my opinion, I am in no way straight edge or anything close but you still have to be able to get you're shit together and do what you have to do to live you're life...IE: Job, School, Relations with family, friends and lovers etc......Everything in moderation...It's nothing personal and I'm not perfect but, if life was perfect, convinient and easy it'd be boring...If I ever say anything to you that sticks let it be this... LIFE IS NEVER EASY. IT WILL NEVER SLIDE ASIDE THE BULLSHIT SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO JUMP OVER IT. WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT, IT IS ABOUT WHO YOU WERE IN THAT HORRIBLE INCONVINIENCE THAT DEFINES WHO YOU REALLY ARE. IF YOU NEVER FOUGHT WITH YOUR LOVE IT'D BE BORING AS HELL...(PLUS MAKE-UP SEX WOULD'NT EXIST, WHAT A SHAME THAT'D BE)..BUT ARE YOU A BIG ENOUGH PERSON TO STICK IT THROUGH OR DO YOU JUMP SHIP AS SOON AS THE STORM SETS IN AND THINGS GET ROUGH...IF YOU CAN WALK HAND IN HAND AND STILL MANAGE TO MISS THE POTHOLES..GREAT..BUT LETS GET REAL, THAT DOES'NT EXIST. THERE IS NO PEACE WITHOUT WAR AND NO LOVE WITH OUT ANGER AND DIFFICULTY, NOTHING AS INTIMATE AS LOVE OR FRIENDSHIP COMES EASY.. LIFE HAS IT'S ORDER..IT DEPENDS IF IT'S WORTH IT TO YOU...IN LOVE, LET PRIDE SNEAK OUT THE BACK DOOR OR TAP DANCE OUT THE FRONT (DEPENDING ON WHO YOU ARE), I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR LOVE...AND I SURE AS HELL WOULD GRAB A LIFE VEST IF MY SHIP BEGAN TO SINK EVEN IF I HAD TO SHARE...THE QUESTION IS WOULD YOU? IT IS HOW YOU REACT TO CONFLICT THAT DEFINES WHO YOU ARE IN LIFE.. ONLY YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.... I just had a friend cash in their chips and kick me out of the casino....but it does'nt mean I don't love Vegas....or that I'll never go there again. This trip was just a taste to let me know I am still capable of going there. I did'nt think I could ever love again and I did so thanks for that. Thanks for letting me realise that all hope is not lost...Fuck...now I want to play Spanish 21...I'll have to settle for solitare and that's just as good...The house always wins, but it's lonely in the winners circle...Thanks Bella. You are brilliant.
